I'll Be Watching You

Think back to the music of your youth. In your innocence, some of the more twisted lyrics likely went right over your head. That hard-rocking song, with the great guitar solo, might have been about date-rape. At 15 or 16, most kids didn't know about things like that, or at least they didn't look for them.

I start with a hypothetical before bringing up the song that truly fits the description. In 1983, the Police released a song titled "Every Breath You Take." It was a hauntingly beautiful song that made the artist (and later band) a whole lot of money. The majority of the public could not hear it enough. Most folks considered it a love song, likely unrequited love. Consider the lyrics.

Every Breath You Take

The Police - 1983

… Every breath you take

And every move you make

Every bond you break

Every step you take

I'll be watching you

… Every single day

And every word you say

Every game you play

Every night you stay

I'll be watching you

… Oh, can't you see

You belong to me?

How my poor heart aches

With every step you take?

… Every move you make

And every vow you break

Every smile you fake

Every claim you stake

I'll be watching you

… Since you've gone, I've been lost without a trace

I dream at night, I can only see your face

I look around, but it's you I can't replace

I feel so cold, and I long for your embrace

I keep crying, baby, baby please

… Oh, can't you see

You belong to me?

How my poor heart aches

With every step you take?

… Every move you make

And every vow you break

Every smile you fake

Every claim you stake

I'll be watching you

Every move you make

Every step you take

I'll be watching you

… I'll be watching you

(Every breath you take)

(Every move you make)

(Every bond you break)

(Every step you take) I'll be watching you

… I'll be watching you

… I'll be watching you

… whoo, hoo

(Every game you play)

(Every night you stay) I'll be watching you

… I'll be watching you

… I'll be watching you

… I'll be watching you

(Every single day)

(Every word you say)

(Every game you play)

(Every night you stay) I'll be watching you

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: Gordon Sumner

Every Breath You Take lyrics © Songs Of Universal Inc.

A little bit of stalking might have been cute back in the 80s, but in the last few decades it has often led to some horrific crimes. And the victims are mothers, sisters, and daughters. The reasons can be everything from obsession to jealousy to psychosis.

And the tools for stalking have advanced to the point where you can quite literally watch, hear, and monitor "every breath they take."

It is somewhat comforting to find out that the band did not see this as a cute love song. It was about obsession, and not the good kind.

Sting would later say, "I think I was thinking of Big Brother, surveillance and control." He also said that was the explanation for his "angry" look in the video - see the video at the end of the post.

That is a little more comforting to know. It still doesn't explain how the mass market somehow completely missed this and made it a hit. 

Now when I hear the song, yes it still gets regular play on the stations that feature 80s music, it just seems really creepy, maybe even scary for girls who have experienced that situation.

They weren't the first or last to sing about surveillance. Cheap Trick previously released "Dream Police" which is in this category. Later in 1983 Rockwell would release a humorous song/video "Somebody's Watching Me" with much commercial success. It seems people like being stalked - at least in music.

No matter the situation, there is no reason to be afraid if you are a Believer. Just TRUST in the Lord, Speak His WORDS of Protection and BELIEVE THEM.

It Is Hot In Texas

When I was a wee lad, I had a football coach who said that God made it hotter in August to get the players ready for the long football season. It sort of made sense. From May to July, thunderstorms would come and go and keep the heat in check. It was just warm enough to have fun - pool, sports, and exploring. But not so hot you preferred inside activities. And then came August.

Being centrally located in the United States, the jet stream, which steers most of the major disturbances, often does some strange things in August. Chief among these is lifting up over Texas and then dropping, freezing (pardon the pun), high-pressure systems over Texas, and sometimes the entire Southwest. This leads to triple digits and brutal stretches until the jet stream repositions, or a major hurricane hits Texas, breaking up the party.

That is exactly what is happening at present. Normally, I am fending off ridiculous claims of climate change during heat waves. Yes, in Summer, it gets warmer. And in the Fall and Winter, the temperatures drop; sunrise, sunset - nothing new under the sun. But surprisingly, those people have moved on to hating Jews and starting a communist revolution in the United States. 

So Texans make jokes about the heat, and endure. And if you're old enough, share your memories of the hottest Summer ever - 1980. That year we had 42 consecutive days with triple-digit heat (June 23 to August 3). 

I remember it quite well. I worked at a car wash as a steamer at 15 years old. It was over 100, I was covered in heavy clothes to protect my skin from the steam wand pushing soapy water out at over 200°F. It got so hot I developed a nasty case of Prickly Heat. If you've never had it, be thankful. It's kind of a heat rash, and it is not pleasant. It was miracle I survived without having a heat stroke.

Working At The Car Wash!

We are not anywhere close to the record set in 1980, but it is toasty in Dallas. Dallas, Texas (DFW Airport) recorded its highest temperature of 2026 on Monday, August 24 - 109°F. (All that concrete and jet exhaust at the airport increases their reading compared to rural stations in the area and even historical data. One day they will adjust for that.) 

It is just your typical late Summer high-pressure system that does not know its days are numbered. But yes, it is hot!

Monday, I was driving along Loop 12 in South Dallas - making my rounds. I came to the bridge over the Trinity River - just a lazy creek this time of year. I still like stealing a peek and imagining myself floating away.

Most bridges in Texas have signs warning people that: "Bridge May Freeze In Cold Weather." It's good information when it's freezing outside. When it's over 100, it just seems silly. I let myself imagine that it was freezing outside. But instead of a pleasing, very cool moment. I saw this:

Hang in there. August ends next week!

A Forgotten Talent - Breast Nicknames

In college, I had the pleasure of being not only a sorority Beau, but THE BEAU of the chapter. The story of how this came to be is beyond the scope of this post. Let's just say it was an honor and a pleasure to have so many young women think so highly of me. I was invited to all the events, and was always welcome at their house. Part of pledge initiation required the girls to introduce themselves, learn a few things about me, and get my signature on their signs - I'm not sure what those were actually called.

It was during my time as close friends to several dozen coeds that I learned I had a particular set of skills - giving nicknames to breasts. Don't assume this was part of perverted sexual rituals. This was just harmless fun. The majority of the women were more like sisters. I grew up very close to my Mother, and had two older sisters. Most of my friends were women. I felt very comfortable around the opposite sex. To them, I was just a giant Teddy Bear, who could reach things nobody in the house could.

I don't even remember how it got started, but soon all the girls were asking me for names for their breasts. No, I did not examine each one naked - that would come later in life when Playboy was a client, and I had to select images for licensed products. The nicknames rarely PHYSICALLY matched the girl's assets. They were just humorous names and slogans/taglines.

The names back then were lost to time. But a few years later, somehow a few women I knew found out about my gift, so it came back to life - culminating in a blog post on Myspace - remember that? While I was recently sorting through computer files, I found the lists. And so this post was born.

During this time, I became quite fond of using company names and slogans. They just work so well. Consider Nice 'n' Easy - shampoo and hair color. The tagline was: "The closer he gets... the better you look!" With a slight tweak, it becomes this:

 

The ’B’ Sides*

Penn & Teller - They're magic!

Romeo & Juliet - Men's eyes were made to look

Ashlee & Jessica (Simpson) - They may not sing, but they're nice on the eyes!

Rocky Mountains - Impressive from any angle

Britney & Jamie Lynn (Spears) - They'll "Drive You Crazy" (or) They were "Born To Make You happy"

Haylie & Hillary (Duff) - My "Material Girls"

Homer & Marge (Simpson) - Mmmmmm... (or) Is there anything they can't do? (or) Woohoo!

Hall & Oates - They need that "lovin' feelin" (or) They're "Maneaters"

Abbott & Costello - Who's on first?

Adam & Eve - They're naked and not ashamed.

Fred & Ginger - Dance with the stars.

Bill & Ted - A most excellent adventure.

Christopher Columbus & Queen Isabel - Explore a new world.

Kirk & Spock - Boldly go where no man has gone before!

Matt Damon & Ben Affleck - How 'bout them apples?

The Two Towers - The time has come for the dominion of Men.  

Bambi and Thumper - If you can't say something nice, don't say nothing at all!

The Wonder Twins (Zan & Jayna) - When they are touched, the Wonder Twin Powers are activated!

Tom & Jerry - Care to play a game of cat & mouse?

Everest & K2 - Who will reach the top first?

Pointer Sisters - They want a man with a slow hand and an easy touch.

Barbara & Jenna (Bush) - If you're their daddy, you're powerful. 

Ben & Jerry - To know them is to love them.

The Olsen Twins (Mary Kate & Ashley) - It takes two (or) Full House

The Thompson Twins - Hold me now.

Dorothy & Toto - You're not in Kansas anymore! (or) People come and go so quickly here! (or) I'll get you pretty, and the little dog too!

*Some may have aged better than others.

Advertising Slogans and Taglines Can Be So Suggestive.

Trinidad & Tobago - Together we aspire, together we achieve

The Energizer Bunnies - They keep going and going and going...

Nintendo DS - Touching is good

G E - They bring good things to life

Allstate - Always in good hands.

Proctor & Gamble - Touching Lives, Improving Life 

Campbell's Soup - M'm! M'm! Good!

Pringles - Once you pop, the fun don't stop. 

Smuckers (Jam & Jelly) - With a name like Smuckers, they have to be good.

Sunny Delight - Unleash the power of the sun. 

Sugar Puffs - With honey goodness

Lucky Charms - They're Magically Delicious!

Twizzlers - Makes mouths happy!

M&M - Melts in your mouth, not in your hand.

Butter Cups - There's no wrong way to eat them. 

Twix - Two For Me! None for you!

Disneyland - The Happiest Place on Earth

Alton Towers - Where wonders never cease

Good & Plenty - Love my good & plenty

Alka-Seltzer - Try it, you'll like it

Bacardi & Cola - They get the job done

Barnum & Bailey (Circus) - The Greatest Show on Earth

AT & T - Reach out and touch them

Braniff Airlines - When you got it, flaunt it

Coca Cola - Deliciously refreshing (or) Good all the way down (or) Demand the genuine - refuse substitutes (or) They're the real thing (or) Feel the difference

Doublemint (Gum) - Double your pleasure, double your fun

Frosted Flakes - They're GR-R-REAT!

Martini & Rossi - For people who share a taste for excitement.   

Tic Tacs - Put a Tic Tac in your mouth and get a bang out of life 

Weebles - Weebles wobble but they don't fall down

So there you have it, plenty of choices for the ladies with discriminating taste. 

DISCLAIMER - In answer to the emails I received after this was originally posted, and in an effort to preempt any emails after this post, no, I'm not a pervert. I do not abuse small furry farm animals. This is all in good fun. If you don't know me and have not read my blogs before, you may be missing some of the running jokes, or just simply not understand my humor - it is an acquired taste. Keep reading at your own risk. Stay long enough and you just might learn something, and have a few laughs.

Originally Posted On Myspace May/June 2008 

Harrison Is Back!

Has it really been almost two years since my last post? That is crazy. Sorry about that, folks. I guess life just got too busy.

I took a merchandising job - gave up the Doordash (DD) gig. Does anyone actually make money Dashing? My calculations showed I actually lost money. But I got out of the house, met some interesting folks, and made a few new friends. The income, and especially the tips, were nowhere near enough to offset the expenses - mainly gasoline at the time, and of course, vehicle maintenance and repairs. And then, I still had to deal with the FERAL taxes at the end of the year, which consumed what was left. 

I advanced to the top at DD - Platinum status, had many favorable reviews, and even a few regulars who actually did tip well. I appreciated the opportunity. Everyone was helpful at corporate. But whenever you deal with the public, you are going to find a few bad ones. And they can screw up your day.

It's Always The Artistic Kids That Cause Trouble

I now work for a very large North American company that specializes in assisting retail with just about everything. In just under two years, I've changed divisions once, and changed companies once. It's a part-time job. One day I might be stocking trading cards on Target shelves. And the next, checking C-stores to confirm they are running a specific beverage promotion. And the resets are a blast. This is when a category - like salad dressing for instance, is rearranged to group them by brand, and/or to give certain products more visibility or slots. 

For instance, we did a salad dressing reset in several Dallas stores. Who knew Hidden Valley had so many flavors and product extensions?

Imagine, A Pasture Full Of Sizzling Hot Strips Of Bacon, Grazing In The Sun.
Why Is This Place Hidden? I Want To Go To There!

  

I never had Covid. But the global panic caused me to lose my job. Then, I did experience some health issues and ended up living with family. After a time, they decided I needed to leave. I sent resumes, called former employers, did the networking, but there was nothing but crickets. All the things that worked in the past seemed useless in this brave new DEI world powered by Artificial Intelligence (AI). 

My background is quite unique. I've done a little of everything in the advertising and marketing world. But the irony is, while my background is diverse, I am the complete opposite. Let me list my strikes: Male, White, Heterosexual, Christian, Conservative, Dispensational Premillennialist. OK, so the last two are likely not relevant to MOST employers. My age might win me some brownie points, but that often is considered a negative as well. Ageism is alive and well.

When I had to hire people, I noticed that even in the 90s, HR was weeding people out on the flimsiest of reasons. Now it is done by computers, who often just search for keywords. Nobody really looks at the individual as a whole. Some of my best hires rarely had what I would call the perfect resume. Yet, they had knowledge of, and a passion for our product, and an eagerness to learn - none of that can be taught!

So how do you get noticed if nobody wants to listen (or read)? That is a challenge. Apparently, big companies do get "brownie points" for hiring certain types of people. The reverse racism of the recent past seems to be in decline. But folks who are economically disadvantaged, veterans, and those with disabilities are among the anointed groups. I have no idea exactly what the incentives are. Maybe tax breaks, a government pat on the head - whatever. I just know every online application is asking these questions. So how do you make this knowledge work for you?

There are dozens of rather common health challenges that are considered disabilities. I honestly don't believe in illness or disabilities, and certainly don't want to claim them. Yet if I do deal with something, why not make it work FOR ME? On a recent application, I found about 6 items I could honestly claim. Thankfully, I did not have to be specific. So if this gives my resume/application a little boost, why not? I hope, at the very least, this gets my resume read by a human.

Whenever I imagine some AI/HR gatekeeper, I picture Lucifer, the cone-headed IL-series Cylon android from Battlestar Galactica - the original TV series from the 70s. He was second-in-command to the human traitor Count Baltar, and the Imperious Leader. Would Lucifer even interview me? 

"BY YOUR COMMAND!"

In the short term, I am learning new skills, attempting to stay current with technology while still writing. As some of you know, I had a couple of websites that featured over 300 Children's stories, Bible lessons, sermons, poems, and songs. They were hacked, and the price demanded to repair and "secure" them sounded more like extortion than good business. I turned instead to other sites like YouTube. With AI, I have the ability to illustrate some of my stories, Its not easy, but I am getting better. There are also many choices, so testing the platforms takes time. I would encourage you to subscribe to my YT channel. Check out the 30 or so videos posted thus far, and follow my progress. Its primarily Christian, but there are few fun things thrown in. Thanks for your support and prayers.

Here is the URL: Harrison Woodard YouTube Channel

It's amazing what you can do with AI, and a little imagination.

Thanks for visiting. I promise to post more often going forward!