Wednesday, November 29, 2023

Surviving The Twelve Dates Of Christmas

Its the film crossover event that couples have dreamed about for years. In theaters this Christmas, a holiday rom-com that when you meet-cute, you die-cute. Its the perfect date film, with something for everyone.


Another Christmas Meet-Cute Goes Awry


The Plot

12 lonely single women make a pact to find love by Christmas. As each one meets their perfect man, they are immediately involved in a horrific accident. Is it Christmas magic? A curse? Or something far more sinister?

Each accident seems to follow a pattern relating to the Christmas song, The Twelve Days Of Christmas.

On the first day, Angie meets her soulmate, Doug, while she is at her grandfather's Christmas tree farm. As they stroll through the farm, they come to a place where some really big trees are being cut for corporate clients. Their movement startles a covey of partridges which fly to one of the recently cut trees. The sudden addition of their weight causes the tree to come crashing down on top of our couple.


Angie and Doug Find Love Among The Trees




On the third day, Grace is at the family chicken farm helping her parents. Prince Albert, of some obscure European nation, takes a tour of the farm. Grace and the prince immediately sense a connection, and start imagining life with each other. Grace gives him a tour of the hen house, when suddenly all the birds attack and peck them mercilessly.

Grace, And the Angry Birds


On the eighth day, a journalist named Kim, visits Luke's dairy farm. She is doing a story on milk production in the state. Throughout the tour it is obvious that there is chemistry between the two. The crew decides to get some shots outside leaving Kim and Luke alone in the dairy barn. In a chain of events that would impress Rube Goldberg, our lovers become victims of the milking equipment.


A Happy Moment Alone For Kim And Luke



The tenth day gets really interesting. Michele is drugged while out partying and awakens in a foreign country where 10 lords fight over her. Who will win? Will she fall in love, or will there be more violence?


Michele Watching The Lords


On the twelfth day, our last ingenue thinks she has found love when she is asked to be a part of a holiday parade. Instead, its a violent protest, including a deadly drumline. Will she survive the trampling and find love?


Kelly Before The Rampage Begins


The Cast


The producers originally set out to cast a very diverse group, including the very best rom-com talent on the planet. A literal whose who of young talent was approached: Autumn Reeser, Candace Cameron Bure, Danica McKellar, Dove Cameron, Emily Kinney, Katrina Norman, Lacey Chabert, Jen Lilley, Jillian Murray, Laura Marano, Mallory Jansen, Mikaela Hoover, Minka Kelly, Monica Barbaro, Poppy Drayton, Rachael Leigh Cook, Rachel Bilson, Samaire Armstrong, Summer Glau, Taylor Cole, Victoria Justice, and Zoey Deutch.

But every actor inexplicably was working on other projects. It was the same story for all five men who appear in 90% of rom-coms. They all had conflicts and could not commit to this project. It looked like the film was DOA. And yet it was decided to just hire some Canadians - they will do anything for a buck!







The Controversy

The film certainly had its fair share of challenges. One of the producers demanded that they put more women in the film, and make them lame. It was explained that more than half the cast were already women, but to appease her demands, a disabled female character was added. After the first screening, and the overwhelming negative feedback to seeing a disabled woman mauled on screen, the part was eliminated.


The Surprise


Select streaming partners will release an interactive version, allowing the audience to select which couple survives and finds love, and those that do not. There will be literally dozens of possibilities totally in the control of the viewer. 

We listened to rom-com and slasher fans and the one consistent complaint was that the movie never ended the way they wanted it to end. Now they will have the ability to control the ending.


The Press


The feedback for the film as been phenomenal. Just take a look at the favorable press thus far.


Never in my 60 years as a film critic have I watched a film like this!

Neal Pearson, Movie Talk 365 


This is one movie that I am glad is lacking diversity!

Evelyn Madden, DEI In Film


I can't believe I kept my dinner down for all 90 minutes!

Billy Masterson, Dallas Times Herald


This is EXACTLY what the holiday season needed! Four stars!

Greg Holbrook, Daily Freak

 

You will LAUGH. You will CRY. You will KISS ten bucks goodbye!

DON'T MISS THIS FILM!

If your local theater is not showing it, demand they do. This is sure to be a holiday favorite for decades!













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